This Ain’t Yo Momma’s Apple Pie

HOMEMADE APPLE PIE

1 gallon apple juice, 1 gallon apple cider, 2 1/2 cups sugar, 4-5 cinnamon sticks, 1 fifth Everclear.

This concoction, like prison hooch*, is surprisingly easy to make. I was able to find all the non-alcoholic ingredients at my local grocery store and Everclear can be found at any self-respecting liquor retailer. Approximate cost: $35.00. Serves: 3 Alcoholics to 10-15 Lightweights.

1. Mix ingredients (except Everclear) in a large pot

I knew that we didn’t have a pot large enough to hold all the liquid, but I knew we had several smaller pots and plenty of burners. So, if you must, improvise as I’ve done here.

Homemade Apple Pie distribute 300x225 This Aint Yo Mommas Apple Pie

2. Bring mixture to a boil

While the mixture is coming to a boil make sure you give each pot a good stir from time to time. The agitation will slow the boiling process, but it will help the sugar to dissolve and keep it from burning.

Homemade Apple Cider boil low angle 300x225 This Aint Yo Mommas Apple Pie

3. Let simmer 30 minutes

This part is very boring. I’d suggest some Netflix to pass the time. Don’t forget the occasionally stirring.

4. Shank a snitch

Homemade Apple Pie shank 300x225 This Aint Yo Mommas Apple Pie

5. Let mixture cool then add Everclear

If you’re going to store your Homemade Apple Pie in different containers, make sure you distribute your liquor evenly. If you want your mixtures to have different bite, then make sure you label each accordingly.

6. Fill and mark container(s)

If you have one, I’d suggest using a funnel. Doesn’t hurt to do this over the sink either. I wanted to make some virgin Homemade Apple Pie for my children.  My virgin and alcoholic mixtures are stored in similar containers, so I’ve  marked them accordingly (lids and labels). X = liquor.

Homemade Apple Cider marking 300x225 This Aint Yo Mommas Apple Pie

Enjoy

Homemade Apple Pie can be enjoyed at any temperature, but for the full experience warm before drinking. This drink goes down smooth and it’s difficult to notice it’s an alcoholic drink. So, when imbibing, do so with caution.

Salud.

*I’ve never been to prison or made prison hooch. I did, however, watch several episodes of “MSNBC’s Lockup” while writing this post.
DISCLAIMER: Homemade Apple Pie is intended for responsible adults of legal drinking age. marclimon.com is not advocating the abuse of alcoholic beverages and hope that if you try the recipe, you do so with moderation and caution. marclimon.com is not responsibile for the effect of the drink and especially not for the actions of people who try the drink.  Be smart, don’t drink and drive. (Greater Topeka area) Capital City Taxi: 785.267.3777 | Yellow Cab Taxi: 785.357.4444

Tags: , , , , , ,

4 Responses to This Ain’t Yo Momma’s Apple Pie

  1. Tracy on 3 January 2011 at 16:35

    Sounds yummy!

  2. Marc on 3 January 2011 at 17:33

    Tracy,
    It was very tasty – if I do say so myself. Thanks for stopping in.

  3. R on 25 March 2013 at 21:58

    This is a great basic recipe. However, it only comes out to about 40 proof, or 20% alcohol. I wanted to crank up the ABV and lower the sugar, and instead used this:

    32 oz apple juice
    32 oz apple cider
    8 cinnamon sticks
    2 cups brown sugar
    2 bottles (est 50 oz./ 1500ml) 190 proof grain alcohol

    Result: Est 45% ABV/ 90 Proof Alcohol

    Boil juice, cider, cinnamon sticks for about 20 mins, stire in sugar. Let cool completely (first on counter, then covered in fridge), then add everclear.

    Made three (3) 32oz bottles- two to friends, one to age in cupboard.
    We used Ikea “EZ-Cap” 32oz bottles (4$/ea), and for decoration, we added wire ribbon “lipstick” – the pattern of classic picnic red/white cloth, and a product description tag attached with thin twine. They came out VERY nice.

    Due to the bottles being so large, I might put them in 1/2 pint (8oz) mason jars instead next time, and have many smaller gifts instead of a few large ones. We’ll cover the tops (before putting on the ring) with the same picnic-color fabric.

  4. Marc on 31 March 2013 at 11:17

    Thanks for the recipe. I never had time to really tweak the recipe I tried in the post. I was enjoyable, but could have been better. I’ll try yours sometime I decide which to tweak.

    Thanks for stopping by.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *